I was vegetarian for a year then I've been vegan for the last 7 months. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years and all that time I've wanted to be vegan but he's been against it but I decided to do it anyway recently because it was important to me. He has now come round to the idea and is happy with my decision and supports it and we don't eat meat or dairy at home but he shows no interest in becoming a vegan himself. When we go out or he buys himself lunch he always buys meat products cause he says he enjoys them. This is becoming increasingly stressful for me and I've expressed to him that I will be raising my kids as vegan and that it's not fair for them to see him eating animal products but he still doesn't seem to want to change. I don't know what to do because obviously I really care for him and don't want to break up but its very difficult for me to watch him making the conscious decision to eat animal products despite everything he now knows about my reasons for becoming vegan. Any advice would be hugely appreciated
Hi there - I do feel your pain... At my age and current situation in life, I would find it extremely difficult, if not impossible, to be in a serious relationship with someone who was not at least pescatarian - even then, it would be hard. I don't really have any advise for you, except to say that while you can continue to share information with him and have "hope," you're not likely to change him unless he wants to change (this goes with anyone about anything). If you have already sat down with him and watched Earthlings, What the Health, Dominion, Running for Good, & The Game Changers (etc), there's really not much else you can do. You really only have a couple of choices - accept him for who he is and the very real fact that he may never change, or you can choose to end the relationship, as difficult as that might be. After 5 years, I can understand how this would be a very difficult choice.
I will say this - My son's dad and I agreed when our son was born that we would raise him with my diet at the time (pescatarian). He (my exH) was and still is an omnivore, but he kept his end of the bargain and tomorrow our son turns 17 and I am happy to say he has never eaten a mammal ever in his life, and while he still does occasionally eat fish, he quit eating dairy and eggs almost a year ago, and he eats vegan when he's with me. Of course now it's really up to him, but has no desire to start eating the animals he's never before eaten. So, it
can be done if both parents respect each other enough to come to an agreement and stick to it.
There's no doubt in my mind that your BF is
able to follow a PB diet (despite what he says or has been told by whomever), but whether or not he chooses to do so, is entire up to him, and any attempts to force change upon him about this or anything else are likely going to backfire. So the real decision ultimately is yours, in that you need to come to terms with what you can live with long term and what you can't - and be honest with yourself and with him and make your decision based on being true to yourself. You have one thing going for you - and that is the fact that he supports your decision and that he doesn't bring meat into your home.
I also have to applaud you for being so forward-thinking that you are considering how you would raise your child
before having children. Many people do not, and given that there are 2 adults in the mix, it's extremely important that you 2 are on the same page about stuff with regards to every aspect about raising children.
I wish you luck and peace with your decision, whatever it may be. xo
EDIT: Somehow I think I got the BF and the person with Type 1 diabetes all mixed up --- but U get the idea I think