Finding the perfect man

[shyvas]

 

[kelli]

Hello Kelli

Had to reply to this. Having a partner isn't the be all and end all, honestly, it's more important to have good friends, loving family, go out and enjoy good times on your own and with other people. Do the things you want and you are passionate about. Or, connect as much as you can, by phone, skype, e-mail, text, even wave out the window or when you are social distancing....

Don't let it get you down. Even when you find one, it's not easy, trust me.... Just because a man is vegan doesn't mean he can't annoy the heck out of you! They can still leave the toilet seat up, etc... Try to enjoy your life and make the most of it as it is. Sending you a virtual hug...

Thanks for the kind reply. i don't have a caring family or friends though. My health is poor so i can not do much.I have started seeing someone recently and he thinks veganism is a cult sadly.

 

[Irene Adler]

Thanks for the kind reply. i don't have a caring family or friends though. My health is poor so i can not do much.I have started seeing someone recently and he thinks veganism is a cult sadly.

Hello Kelli

Aw, that makes me feel sad. You always have people here ....

I hope you can gently work on your significant someone. Just so he slowly starts to realise that it's not some brain-washing cult..... sending a virtual hug to you.

 

[Danielle]

Think my mom said something like that, compared them to jehovah witness. Still, she is very supportive of me being vegan.

 

[silva]

Thanks for the kind reply. i don't have a caring family or friends though. My health is poor so i can not do much.I have started seeing someone recently and he thinks veganism is a cult sadly.

First off, ugly should only be used to describe a personality, not a look. And please, keep yourself as your first and foremost priority!!! I haven't been in a relationship for many many years. I always listened to my heart and not my head, to my detriment

 

[VegetaBrooke]

Thanks for the kind reply. i don't have a caring family or friends though. My health is poor so i can not do much.I have started seeing someone recently and he thinks veganism is a cult sadly.

First off, ugly should only be used to describe a personality, not a look. And please, keep yourself as your first and foremost priority!!! I haven't been in a relationship for many many years. I always listened to my heart and not my head, to my detriment

So agree with Silva. When I think back to all of the truly beautiful people I've known in my life, it had absolutely nothing to do with their looks. True beauty shines from the inside out.

 

[VegetaBrooke]

Thanks for the kind reply. i don't have a caring family or friends though. My health is poor so i can not do much.I have started seeing someone recently and he thinks veganism is a cult sadly.

I think if you are patient with him and show him what veganism is all about he may start to see things differently. Sometimes people just need exposure to different ways of being to change their ideas on things. If that doesn't work, just tell him you're making a voodoo doll of him out of an eggplant JOKING!

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with some health issues and you're feeling lonely. But please know as far as friends go, you can meet them anywhere--I bet even here Hugs to you

 

[Hog]

When I was young, I was too serious and had my head in the textbooks. I missed out on so much. There are countless young ladies who I should have taken out to lunch. They made their moves but I was too slow to respond.

If you were a guy, I would suggest that you borrow a baby. The girls just come out of the thin air. Ideally, the kid should be four or younger. The kid will do all the flirting for you. For example, my half-brother said, "Hello, I have diarrhea." to a cute girl. Then he insisted that she shake his teddybear's hand. I felt mortified as he loudly talked in public." That cute girl later became my wife.

According to what I read, the girl always needs to make the first move. She needs to guide the guy through the entire process. She also needs to make sure that it looked like the guy took the initiative.

I thought at one time that girls go for the smart and mature guy. Then, I had my younger son who is an immature late bloomer. He has lots of girlfriends. I realized, "Oh my gosh! My son is living proof that girls prefer their boys served up stupid."

 

[Urban Gardener]

I'll be honest. I just like nice guys. Attitude is everything. A guy who has a warm, embracing attitude towards life is attractive. A guy who is really genuine, no matter how flawed (within reason) is attractive. I like guys who stand out because of their kindness, their passion for what they do, their interesting ideas, the way they treat other people.

These days, there is a lot of negging. I think it's become more popular. A lot of guys engage in power trips and try to cut you down. Or they try manipulative nonsense (telling lies that they think will impress you, trying to stir up drama over random things, acting like they have a superiority complex). The nonsense is obvious and it's a huge turn-off.

I like a guy who's secure enough in who he is that he can be real, be himself, and treat other people as equals - fellow humans.

I do my best to be real and to become a better person every day. So, in keeping with that, maybe I'll attract someone similar. Or I'll just enjoy the peace and quiet of being alone.

 

[shyvas]

A guy who has a warm, embracing attitude towards life is attractive. A guy who is really genuine, no matter how flawed (within reason) is attractive. I like guys who stand out because of their kindness, their passion for what they do, their interesting ideas, the way they treat other people.

Yes. However, I have never met him.

 

[Urban Gardener]

Yes. However, I have never met him.

No one's perfect. I'm not a shining example of all of that, and I can't expect anything better of other people.

But that's the stuff that's attractive. I don't know why people go for the insults and power trips, and the superficial stuff.

 

[Hog]

@ NYC - In an alternate universe, where I never got married. I am drinking coffee right now with you.

@ Shyvas - I just blew you a romantic kiss. Let me know when it arrives. It is floating towards you now. (Do not worry. My wife gave me permission.)

 

[Mikkel]

The older we get, the more picky we become. So if we did not find our perfect match before age 25, it's hopless. All the good ones are taken, and remember. That's not us!

 

[shyvas]

The older we get, the more picky we become. So if we did not find our perfect match before age 25, it's hopless. All the good ones are taken, and remember. That's not us!

It may be more difficult to find the perfect match once who've hit the 40 mark but there's always hope. I think that men have it easier as they manage to find much younger women; whereas women often have to go for older men.

 

[Mikkel]

It may be more difficult to find the perfect match once who've hit the 40 mark but there's always hope. I think that men have it easier as they manage to find much younger women; whereas women often have to go for older men.

But we just end up with the leftovers and the used and discarded ones (divorced. )! In my circle of friends from younger age, people have in fact inherited other's exes... They didn't even find their own partners, they just reused their friends' partners.

I guess if you ask men, I don't think they see it as any easier. But when you see that murders in prison get letters from women wanting to marry them, I really wonder what's wrong with the rest of us. I haven't even hit someone in 20 years! But yeah, I did get a proposal over Facebook from a penpal at least, so not too bad I guess!

But even Prince Charles got his Camilla at high age, so you never know what can happen.

 

[Urban Gardener]

People find people after the age of 40 all the time.

I think it gets easier in some ways. We get wiser as we age (most of us do). That wisdom can be applied to relationships.

 

[Mikkel]

People find people after the age of 40 all the time.

I think it gets easier in some ways. We get wiser as we age (most of us do). That wisdom can be applied to relationships.

You are all so resonable here!

 

[Urban Gardener]

I'm at a point in life where I'm not actively looking for anyone. I get asked out a lot, but it's mostly by people who seem misinformed about me (probably judging based on superficial stuff) or with whom there isn't much common ground. I prefer to be alone unless I'm with someone who sees me for who I am and likes me for who I am. And there has to be the right kind of connection. Otherwise, it's not worth it.

 

[Raven]

I get asked out a lot

Yes, so do I even though I wear my wedding ring when I'm out.

I get hit on by men quite a lot, not many vegans or vegetarians as far as I know, though. I don't even think I'm that attractive but last time I went to a concert I had six men approach me.

If my husband died or we got divorced I don't think I would specifically look for a vegan partner.

It may be more difficult to find the perfect match once who've hit the 40 mark but there's always hope. I think that men have it easier as they manage to find much younger women; whereas women often have to go for older men.

Yes, that is true. Men do seem to go for younger women. Maybe because they are more naive and accept older men because they think they will protect them.

 

[Mikkel]

I'm not looking for anyone either. What @NYC Gardener says is so true...

I can't grow taller, change my past, change who I am etc. Deal with it, or leave. So far leave has been the best option... If I find someone who stays, I do. If not, well then I don't.