I had really intense nightmares and sleep paralysis last night.
Since the summer I've been going on a self-guided "haunted tour" of my region which likely affects my mind, but for a few weeks around Halloween I was also watching horror movies (most of which I love because I honestly work out problems or work out anger/fear through them, they don't "stay with me" often in adulthood), and weird documentaries. One documentary of particular note was a newscast from 2014 where three women were in a drunk driving accident after a night out partying, and yes they were guilty, their driver was drunk and even said "we're drunk driving woooooh" (something I wouldn't have done myself even at 18 or 19 but w/e) AND the spectacular reason they made the news was because the survivor recorded the entire thing on her phone. She thought they were having a fun night out so was filming inside the car and so incidentally filmed the crash and moments afterward. I didn't think it bothered me that much, I watched it twice because there was no graphic violence (it was late at night and mostly dark) and all you hear is this woman saying they're drunk driving and that if they die, they know where they're going that night...then they die. It's one of the ******* creepiest things I've ever seen because of that final statement she makes before they skid off the road and start screaming. I wonder if the driver would have been tried for murder if she hadn't died because of it.
ANYWAY...so last night I have this crazy dream where desks are moving in my room like in a horror movie about poltergeists. Except they look like school desks from the college, not like anything actually in my room. The second time it happened in my dream, I was so frightened I tried to yell for my mother (yes my mommy, not one of my roommates or whatever) and the desk, with a mind of its own blocked my bedroom door. I also felt the powerlessness and involuntary mutism of sleep paralysis, so I think I was experiencing sleep paralysis because I was "in my room" in the dream and couldn't move and could barely speak. And people often experience sleep paralysis as "evil" - I always have.
The funny thing is that I thought my mom was in my vegan roommates room. I also think that the school desks blocking my bedroom door could symbolize my dark collegiate experiences this semester standing in the way of my personal life and/or from me "getting on with my life" like school has taken on a mind or importance of its own without me, that is no longer helpful to my greater life. Thus the possessed school chairs are school getting in the way of my real life. Another weird detail of the dream is that the ceiling starting falling in on my head, and when I got up (in the dream) and looked in the mirror, there were chunks of mud in my hair, that reminded me of the Earth around my home when I was a child. Like the ground had fallen on me, or I had emerged from a grave. I also thought I felt mild aftershocks of an earthquake last night before I fell to sleep, so that may have just been an earthquake dream, not sure.
Then I was with my mom in a dead lady's house and the furniture was untouched like a house abandoned for decades, or a room left as a shrine to a dead person, and I was creepy-interested (like I would be when I'm awake) and the mirrors had odd decor. I asked my mother if it was from the 50s or 60s, and she said "from the 1950s."
I also had flashes of the faces of these women from the recorded 2014 car accident, and felt like someone was grabbing my leg. I woke up and was kicking my leg and literally no one was there, not a single soul, I hadn't even kicked my covers off.
These were the scariest dreams I've had in a while even if they don't sound that scary on paper. They really felt haunted. Even the 50s thing is weird, I've become more and more convinced there was a house before my townhouse on the land I'm living, or that "old wood" was used in the construction of my home (common here because of the lumber industry), etc. I've picked up different time periods in different places I've been in this town. In my college dorm when I first moved here it was the 80s, I picked up weird vibes around some of the older housing and realized A LOT of people have committed suicide on my college campus (probably due to the rainy, dark weather and isolation), and once during the summer I was complete sober, and had the flash of a very petite adult woman - maybe 4'11, 90 lbs - in a conservative, dark plaid Victorian dress with a hoop skirt, with dark hair, a candle and her face smashed in and bloody. I've also once had an image of indigenous tribal people running through the woods near my house with knives, AAAAANNND that's what my dreams freak me out so much.
I feel like I'm living in a very haunted place. I find it interesting, but I also need to protect myself, I don't like the idea that evil could "get me." I know how silly and childish that sounds, I don't care, it's how I feel.
Since the summer I've been going on a self-guided "haunted tour" of my region which likely affects my mind, but for a few weeks around Halloween I was also watching horror movies (most of which I love because I honestly work out problems or work out anger/fear through them, they don't "stay with me" often in adulthood), and weird documentaries. One documentary of particular note was a newscast from 2014 where three women were in a drunk driving accident after a night out partying, and yes they were guilty, their driver was drunk and even said "we're drunk driving woooooh" (something I wouldn't have done myself even at 18 or 19 but w/e) AND the spectacular reason they made the news was because the survivor recorded the entire thing on her phone. She thought they were having a fun night out so was filming inside the car and so incidentally filmed the crash and moments afterward. I didn't think it bothered me that much, I watched it twice because there was no graphic violence (it was late at night and mostly dark) and all you hear is this woman saying they're drunk driving and that if they die, they know where they're going that night...then they die. It's one of the ******* creepiest things I've ever seen because of that final statement she makes before they skid off the road and start screaming. I wonder if the driver would have been tried for murder if she hadn't died because of it.
ANYWAY...so last night I have this crazy dream where desks are moving in my room like in a horror movie about poltergeists. Except they look like school desks from the college, not like anything actually in my room. The second time it happened in my dream, I was so frightened I tried to yell for my mother (yes my mommy, not one of my roommates or whatever) and the desk, with a mind of its own blocked my bedroom door. I also felt the powerlessness and involuntary mutism of sleep paralysis, so I think I was experiencing sleep paralysis because I was "in my room" in the dream and couldn't move and could barely speak. And people often experience sleep paralysis as "evil" - I always have.
The funny thing is that I thought my mom was in my vegan roommates room. I also think that the school desks blocking my bedroom door could symbolize my dark collegiate experiences this semester standing in the way of my personal life and/or from me "getting on with my life" like school has taken on a mind or importance of its own without me, that is no longer helpful to my greater life. Thus the possessed school chairs are school getting in the way of my real life. Another weird detail of the dream is that the ceiling starting falling in on my head, and when I got up (in the dream) and looked in the mirror, there were chunks of mud in my hair, that reminded me of the Earth around my home when I was a child. Like the ground had fallen on me, or I had emerged from a grave. I also thought I felt mild aftershocks of an earthquake last night before I fell to sleep, so that may have just been an earthquake dream, not sure.
Then I was with my mom in a dead lady's house and the furniture was untouched like a house abandoned for decades, or a room left as a shrine to a dead person, and I was creepy-interested (like I would be when I'm awake) and the mirrors had odd decor. I asked my mother if it was from the 50s or 60s, and she said "from the 1950s."
I also had flashes of the faces of these women from the recorded 2014 car accident, and felt like someone was grabbing my leg. I woke up and was kicking my leg and literally no one was there, not a single soul, I hadn't even kicked my covers off.
These were the scariest dreams I've had in a while even if they don't sound that scary on paper. They really felt haunted. Even the 50s thing is weird, I've become more and more convinced there was a house before my townhouse on the land I'm living, or that "old wood" was used in the construction of my home (common here because of the lumber industry), etc. I've picked up different time periods in different places I've been in this town. In my college dorm when I first moved here it was the 80s, I picked up weird vibes around some of the older housing and realized A LOT of people have committed suicide on my college campus (probably due to the rainy, dark weather and isolation), and once during the summer I was complete sober, and had the flash of a very petite adult woman - maybe 4'11, 90 lbs - in a conservative, dark plaid Victorian dress with a hoop skirt, with dark hair, a candle and her face smashed in and bloody. I've also once had an image of indigenous tribal people running through the woods near my house with knives, AAAAANNND that's what my dreams freak me out so much.
I feel like I'm living in a very haunted place. I find it interesting, but I also need to protect myself, I don't like the idea that evil could "get me." I know how silly and childish that sounds, I don't care, it's how I feel.
