can vegan be in a relationship with nonvegan

fashy

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  1. Vegan newbie
Any long-term relationship requires respect. Whilst your partner may not understand veganism, they can at least support your choice. That means no bacon jokes, mocking veganism to the family, or moaning about your food (well, unless it tastes really bad). It does mean being open to meeting halfway on topics and decisions. This could be trying a vegan ‘faux meat’ meal so you can eat and cook together once per week. What’s important to you, should at the very least gather respect and acceptance from them.

But, respect goes both ways. While you may not approve of people eating meat (I feel your pain), you have to be able to accept the fact that your significant other may go vegan in 1 months time, 10 years time, or maybe even never. But it doesn’t prevent you from being a positive influence on them, introducing them to different vegan meals so that you can eat together, and maybe even reduce their meat intake. If you can’t handle the thought that your partner may never go vegan, it may be time to have a frank conversation about your future.
To have a successful relationship the following most be considered

  1. Respect- a Requirement for Being in ANY Relationship
  2. Setting Boundaries; a Key Component to Being in a Relationship With a Non-Vegan
  3. Adapt Meals To Suit
  4. Communication is Essential in Being in a Relationship with a Non-Vegan
  5. Think Long-Term
  6. Don’t Take Things To Heart
 
This is great advice. My husband is not vegan, but is very supportive. He's happy to eat vegan meals, and he is always looking out for me and supportive of my lifestyle. Likewise, I don't hassle him about being pre-vegan (...I have hope...) and am generally respectful and kind. I think relationships like this can work, but like you say, it just requires communication, boundaries, and respect. :heart:
 
I used to think that it was possible, but a recent occurrence has me questioning that. My husband and I have been married for over 20 years. I am vegan and he is a flexitarian. I switched from vegetarian to vegan several years before we got married. Our house has always been vegan and he always seemed fine with that. I never stopped him from eating meat outside the house. Last week I found chicken bones hidden in an empty bag in the back of the fridge. His willingness to live in a vegan house made me feel like he loved and respected me, but this now has me worried and sanitizing everything every day before I use it. I haven't said anything, because I don't know what to say. I don't want to sound selfish and petty, but I'm really having a hard time dealing with it.

Anybody have advice?
 
I think if you've been able to make it work for this many years that you should be able to have a quiet conversation about what you found in the fridge. Maybe it was a one off? Maybe those bones have been there for a long time? Not discussing it leads to hidden resentment and maybe building it up to something bigger than it needs to be?

good luck, welcome to the forum, let us know if there any other way we can help, Emma JC
 
I used to think that it was possible, but a recent occurrence has me questioning that. My husband and I have been married for over 20 years. I am vegan and he is a flexitarian. I switched from vegetarian to vegan several years before we got married. Our house has always been vegan and he always seemed fine with that. I never stopped him from eating meat outside the house. Last week I found chicken bones hidden in an empty bag in the back of the fridge. His willingness to live in a vegan house made me feel like he loved and respected me, but this now has me worried and sanitizing everything every day before I use it. I haven't said anything, because I don't know what to say. I don't want to sound selfish and petty, but I'm really having a hard time dealing with it.

Anybody have advice?

This is a completely crazy time and perhaps he's just temporarily lost his way (hopefully). Definitely have a chat. My question is why bones? I could better understand finding chicken nuggets or something he might want to eat, but not trash. Why wasn't that thrown away?
 
I've been with my non-vegan husband for nearly 30 years. He eats mostly vegan food at home and meat in restaurants and for his lunch etc. He didn't often cook meat at home, he goes through phases every now and then. There has recently been a few things in the fridge and sometimes I'll make his dinners for him, including meat sometimes. I've made comments over the years on and off but all it ever did was **** him off. I'm not going to change him and I don't think I have a right to give him grief cause it's his decision what he eats. I just switch off about it. Life's too short for conflict I feel. I have to cook meat for my residents in work and just get on with it. I'm happy that my husband eats mostly vegan at home and he cooks many delicious vegan meals for me. It's such a personal thing what to accept and not accept, I think it's good to lead by example 😊