The New "Improved" Beyond Burger

Forest Nymph

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Lifestyle
  1. Vegan
I honestly didn't know if I had one yet because it's the most common veggie meat product I have, so I thought there was a possibility I didn't really notice the "improving" of the product. Especially since I can order it at a local deli covered in numerous toppings.

WELLL....I purchased and thawed out some BB's for my home consumption, and at first thought they had gone bad because I let them thaw for like three days instead of just overnight. They had white things in them. What is that? Mold? Maggots? That doesn't look good.

But there on the package it says something like New! White Marbling! It looked totally inedible, the bright pinkish-red burgers were much more inviting, imo.

So I fry it. Guess what? The "white marbling" or something else makes it look scarily like a beef hamburger when pan fried now. It looked like something from my childhood I didn't want to eat. I struggled with the appearance of the new product until I smothered it in vegan cheese and condiments and got it on my plate.

It tastes okay. It doesn't taste extremely different. But I'm wondering if it tastes different at all, and my perception is being influenced by the "meaty" appearance. It might help people who love meat but it was kind of a slap in the face to me.

Probably will still order them when I go out, but may be less likely to cook them at home now.
 
So.... i had to look it up and Beyond Meat uses Cocoa Butter and Coconut Oil to replicate marbling.

It got me thinking that if Canrists really want a more authentic meat-eating experience including extra fat, maybe there are some other things that the Plant-Based Meat Magicians can do to heighten their experience. And that got me to thinking why stick with authentic but ordinary and boring everyday culinary experiences. How about some really uniques tastes and textures?

The first thing that jumped into my imagination was Frozen Monkey Brains, ala Indiana Jones. Tastes like real brains! Zombie fans would like that too. IZombie fans know already know some great ways to prepare brains. And since very few people know what monkey brains taste like - it could taste like anything.

Fred and Wilma often went out and enjoyed a Brontosaurus Steak. We could have a plant-based version of that. The package could show a picture of a happy brontosaurus grazing in an idyllic Jurassic Era swamp.

Spicy Phoenix wings. Pickled Minotaur knuckles, Tiger tail soup.

Beyond Meat and Impossible could take on whole new meanings.
 
So.... i had to look it up and Beyond Meat uses Cocoa Butter and Coconut Oil to replicate marbling.

It got me thinking that if Canrists really want a more authentic meat-eating experience including extra fat, maybe there are some other things that the Plant-Based Meat Magicians can do to heighten their experience. And that got me to thinking why stick with authentic but ordinary and boring everyday culinary experiences. How about some really uniques tastes and textures?

The first thing that jumped into my imagination was Frozen Monkey Brains, ala Indiana Jones. Tastes like real brains! Zombie fans would like that too. IZombie fans know already know some great ways to prepare brains. And since very few people know what monkey brains taste like - it could taste like anything.

Fred and Wilma often went out and enjoyed a Brontosaurus Steak. We could have a plant-based version of that. The package could show a picture of a happy brontosaurus grazing in an idyllic Jurassic Era swamp.

Spicy Phoenix wings. Pickled Minotaur knuckles, Tiger tail soup.

Beyond Meat and Impossible could take on whole new meanings.
You aren't the only one who has thought along those lines ;). I had a bit of an "alien food" thing where I would try to make other worldly foods. I also always wondered what it would take (using seitan, carved wood and a yuba skin) to make exotic faux animals, with a few possible "shock" ones in the mix (human baby, dog, cat, etc). The shock ones would have been for family get togethers, with some cut "meat" out, and the rest under one of those food tray lids. The look on the face of any Carnist who thought the "meat" was good when they lift that lid... Eh I would never actually do that tho, as the carnists would just start complaining instead of making the connection.

Most recent thoughts on such dishes : Leg of Orc. Arm of Ogre. Human ribs. For Dnd style table top gaming of course. ;)
 
And for the kids. TV-inspired fake foods.

Krabby Patties
Butter Beer- nondairy and nonalcoholic beverage for wizards, witches, and muggles.
Tru blood - synthetic blood beverage for vampires and vampire lovers
Chocolate Salty Balls - veganized version.


ideas liberated from
 
And for the kids. TV-inspired fake foods.

Krabby Patties
Butter Beer- nondairy and nonalcoholic beverage for wizards, witches, and muggles.
Tru blood - synthetic blood beverage for vampires and vampire lovers
Chocolate Salty Balls - veganized version.


ideas liberated from

I think all of these are actually do-able. Sort of like Gardein crab cakes but bigger, maybe with different spices for the Krabby Patties.

Butter Beer would sell, in fact it would be an easy sell. Some vanilla-carmel-ish flavor in soda water and maybe a bit of coconut cream would do it. It could be made like an Italian cream soda.

Tru Blood is in The Vegan Studies Project, Laura Wright notes the cultural significance of the vampires actually being vegan, while humans still eat meat and even drink vampire blood to get high, that the vampire became something else entirely in that show. That would be perfect for Halloween. Just serve Bloody Mary's in a fancy container that says Tru Blood.

Chocolate Salty Balls could just be chocolate pecan balls with salted vegan caramel. Kind of like a "turtle" cookie.