Struggling to cope with the way things are


Nov 22, 2017
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  1. Vegan newbie
This isn't about me stopping Veganism, because I've absolutely adored Veganism so far, excluding all the sad news and stuff, it's tasty, slimming, and it introduces you to some of the most lovely people! But I have been having a lot of physiological issues, and I was wondering if anyone else deals with this and/or has methods of preventing or making it a little less, Intense?

My family, or Foster family, is consistent of non-vegans. They view me as some alien, or fragile person. I've always had issues with eating, it's one of my main issues actually, my Veganism doesn't have anything to do with it I just have an eating disorder. I sometimes feel the urge to throw up, and pretty much all the time, begin to cry, when I see my carers munching on meat and other animal products. This happens when I see adverts, and I actually almost cried just now because of the pizza advert displaying on the screen...

In my mind, all these horrid images of those documentaries start to play, and I can hear their screams. It's absolutely overwhelming when I come to face that every minute of my life, someone else's is stolen and the majority of the world simply do not care... It's filled me with a deep sadness, but for some reason, I've never been able to feel hatred for humanity. I think it's because of Vegans.

Today my Carers daughter was cooking a Chicken in the oven when I came down to get some water, and I kept my eyes away from it. I couldn't even breath in. She said to me that "Chicken's are ugly anyway~" So I snapped, I said to her that Since when does someone's appearance determine their right to live? She went on about how her day had been stressful, and how I started an argument for no reason. It's like Non-vegans can say all this hurtful stuff, and a simple phrase that doesn't even imply any sort of insult, is not allowed?

After her swearing at me, saying how I was being insensitive, and how I didn't know her stress, I blurted out that She could never know the stress of seeing someone else profit from the torment of another, and feeling like you have a muzzle on. She said to me that it was impossible to love animals that I didn't know... This just brought me to join this forum, because I've never reached out to other vegans before now.

They're like this all the time. I'm almost coming to my first year of Veganism, but thanks to the people around me, it's been so difficult. The adverts, and scents of meat, are absolutely everywhere. I simply do not know how to cope with this anymore.

What I'm looking for is any kind of tips on how to deal with this, I'll never stop defending myself and the innocent animals, no matter what swear words are used against me.
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I can imagine how you feel. Both my husband and I are vegan, but despite that, I still go through periods when I feel extremely depressed about what is happening at factory farms every minute of every day.

I watched a video today of a lecture by Melanie Joy, a prominent vegan psychologist, entitled "Understanding carnism for effective vegan advocacy". It's on YouTube, posted by VeganKanal on September 10, 2016. As the title indicates, it's about effective vegan activism, but it indirectly addresses some of the issues you're dealing with. Joy understands how it feels to be a vegan surrounded by meat-eaters who don't seem to care. She points out that the way we usually respond to this is ineffective. She also gives tips on how to avoid burnout. I think it might help you. (I'm sorry; I can't post the link because I joined today. But if you Google the information above, you should be able to find the video.)

Hang in there. Remember that you're saving animals every single day that you're vegan, and that's what's important. You're not responsible for the actions of other people. They get defensive because your mere existence as a vegan reminds them that their actions are not in line with their beliefs. That's not your problem; it's theirs. But if you want to maximize the probability that they will open their hearts to your message, it's important not to attack them back. The video talks about ways to respond, but remember that it's not your job to change their minds. Good luck!
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Hi Nathan
I feel exactly how you do. Never a day goes by and i cannot understand how it is 'normal' to eat animals and it seems nobody cares about their suffering. Just remember you are not alone, we care. I know its hard but you need to try and ignore nasty comments from ignorant selfish people, your values and attitude make you a lovely person.
Yeah I live with suite mates because I'm studying and all the girls promised they were vegan or vegetarian. Then one gets a boyfriend and they start cooking bacon in the kitchen and I want to vomit, I want to yell at them - instead I asked her nicely to make sure she cleaned up the meat and when she left, I sprayed essential oil spray in the kitchen and opened the window.

I would suggest you actually avoid commercials on television if you can. I try not to watch television and watch movies or stream shows instead. There's no need to continually expose your empathy to a sick society, for myriad reasons, one of which is mindless consumption of animals.

When I was in my teens I was one of those people who felt sorry for everyone, even sociopaths. As I grew found out more about the world, and particularly what Americans do to animals and the environment, my hatred of humanity reached an all-time high about the time Trump was elected. That hatred is revived if I spend too much time on politics or Twitter, or if I pay too much attention to people causing damage to the vegan movement anywhere on-line, like in YouTube videos. I can be fine then get set off by certain things. IRL I'm trying to surround myself with more like-minded and supportive people.

As time has passed I've learned there is a grace in avoiding, and knowing what you can deal with and what is toxic to you. I think reaching out to other vegans is a great idea. I don't know what you mean by Carer, but are you able to find a different one, who is at least vegetarian if not vegan?
Man your a cool dad. Adopt me. lol
How could she say that? Chickens re cute and kind! All animals are.
Sorry about your daughter. Maybe show her how animals are treated online.Those peta videos or mercy for animals. Maybe buy her lots of veggie nock meats .
Family is hard to deal with.