I'm 17 yrs old and going to highschool ever since I was a kid I've struggled with depression and anxiety. I didn't know what it was and had to deal with it on my own. Up until early highschool I learned that I was suffering with mental illness, I didn't get much support from family just criticism such as I need to toughen up. They don't realize how painful it was. During my second year in highschool I noticed that it's started to affect me physically such as insomnia, acid reflux, rapid heartbeat, and bad digestion. It's hard to always feel sick when you see so many kids having fun and living their lives. There's so many things I want to do and I want to get better. Iconstantly cry out for help but no one will take me seriously, I've had suicidal thoughts for years but I don't want to die being forgotten. I come to terms that I only have myself. I've done so much research for the past years and watched so many films vegan has really stuck out to me since diet is a key component to health. In middle school I've struggled with binge eating disorder I've recovered but still have that thought in the back of my mind that I might return to old habits. I've been vegan for about five months now and noticed a major difference in my digestion, skin, and stomach acidity, although it's still not the best it's a lot better than before. In my house my parents don't buys a lot of vegetables or produce but I work with what I get. It's been going great for a while I felt good and finally felt there was some hope, but recently I don't know what it is but I've been experiencing major depression I lost that hope and sunk myself in another hole. It was recently my brothers birthday and he had a big cake I don't know why it's usually very easy to avoid food like that but I was so drawn to it. I thought maybe if I have just one piece I'll be satisfied but of course it wasn't. Having all that cake brought me back to my binge days as I remeber how addicted I was and disgusted I felt no matter how much I wanted to stop I couldn't. I really thought things were getting better but I find my past coming back to haunt me. This is my first forum, I'd appreciate your feedback and apologize for it being so long.