Exactly this
I changed my own approach after reading "How to create a vegan world". The author talks about the real and meanigful changes. Flexitarians are the most influential group regarding reducing the cruelty towards animals because it's the biggest one. Making small steps is really important. 1000 flexitarians/vegetarians are ultimately more influential than one vegan. Like, no, I won't eat a non-vegan birthday cake with my friends but sometimes I won't check all the ingredients of rolls or bread because the list isn't always available at the stores and like 95% of them are vegan here (unless it's obvious that the topping is cheesy or something like that). But I'm still opposed to the idea of using animals. If there are clear vegan labels, I'll always choose those products over non-vegan ones.
And according to Tobias Leenaert (the book's author), it's more pragmatic to be inclusive. I do consider myself vegan even if I use non-vegan floor cleaner or won't ask the company if the flavouring (aroma? not sure if that's the right word, I'm not a native speaker) in their chips is vegan.
Also, I love my non-vegan mum. I would never cut contact with her. I love my vegetarian best friend. I love my vegan sister that sometimes eats products containing trace amounts od milk and eggs. I love all the super vegans that actively work for a better world. Like someone else mentioned it earlier here, I'm not less of a feminist if I have some unfeminist fantasies. Sure, I am trying to be better at being a vegan. I'd be so happy if every food, cosmetics, clothing, etc. were vegan. And to achieve something close to that, we shouldn't judge people too much. We will never be perfect because perfection is up to interpretation by every single human being.
