Vegan newbie: advice?

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Hello. My name is Ellsie and I've been a vegetarian for 3 years, vegan for 6 months... though I'm not sure I can still call myself one. About a hour ago, I ate half a bowl of noodles that my father bought me before realizing that it had egg in it. I feel awful. I'm the worst vegan ever. I'm often too meek to ask people if what they're giving me is vegan. I don't want to be a burden, first of all. When I first went vegetarian 3 years ago, my mother said: "Why do you insist on making my life hard?" and I felt just terrible- but I couldn't continue to eat meat without loathing myself for all the harm I was causing.
Second, I've only been vegan for six months, and I've seen many eye-rolls, heard many annoyed sighs- and, as confident as I am in my convictions, they really get to me.
My family is carnivorous. My house always smells of burning flesh, and I'm sick of it. I don't know anyone like me- vegan- and being surrounded by all of these carnivores makes me feel absurd. I feel quite insane- making a big deal out of something that everyone around me sees as trivial and unimportant. Throwing myself over a moth to protect them from my family. Tearfully begging my father to use no-kill mouse traps. ("They're not pets! They're pests!")
In essence, I really need vegan company- a vegan sanctuary... I hope I can find that here. Support and guidance, because I'm still finding my way.
 

TofuRobot

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Welcome! No need to apologize here. We get it <3 . It's difficult for people when someone around them changes, especially when those changes force them to confront their own behaviors. It makes them uncomfortable, so it's easier to pick on the odd one out. All you can do is follow your heart. I think eventually, people will come to accept it. Sometimes you have to make a clear statement like "look, this is who I am, and you don't have the right to be disrespectful to me simply because you don't understand me."

I watched a good video recently about how not to let people run over you. I know it's not easy, but know you're not alone.

#7: Calling people out on their bad behavior:

xo
 
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Indian Summer

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Welcome, Ellsie! Yes, this is exactly the right place!

Also: Been there, done that! It's a long time ago, though. My parents weren't thrilled about my change of lifestyle either. Could I not make an exception just this one time? Just for Christmas? Could I not at least eat fish? "No one will think less of you if you do." And so on and so on. Well, I stuck to my guns.

And don't worry if you make mistakes, it's only human. I know I've made my fair share. You're still vegan! Just get back on the horse, uh - hobby horse?
 

Emma JC

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welcome Ellsie! yup we're here for you!

Venting is welcome and we also look forward to contributions from you and updates on how it is going with your friends and family.

You have lots of years ahead of you to make your vegan journey happy and fulfilling and so do the best you can for now without making yourself miserable and know that as you get older you can have more and more control.

A few noodles with eggs is not the end of the world and it could be a situation where you pick your battles and be picky on the bigger things and give a little, where you have to, on the smaller ones.

There is a vegan festival coming up in November in Glascow so that might be a good opportunity to go and meet up with other vegans and maybe find a friend or two to share the journey with.
https://www.vegfest.co.uk/event/glasgow-vegan-winter-festival/

It sounds like you have a great heart!!

Emma JC
 
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Hi Ellsie you have definitely come to the right place. I couldn't have said it better than Emma JC! You have so many years ahead so don't beat yourself up. Do it incrementally and do it slowly at your leisure. Go to places where vegans meet, meet people that are likeminded and surround yourself with what you want in life.

All the best Ellsie, we are here for you!
 
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Andy_T

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Hello Ellsie, welcome to the forum!

I am pretty sure there's a lot of Glas-Vegans (I guess you can call fellow vegan people from Glasgow that) :)
Having a worldwide community to support you is awesome, but nothing beats local friends who think alike...
 

Forest Nymph

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First, I want to congratulate you for being a vegan despite your meekness and your family's judgments. That's a big deal. Second, welcome!
 
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PTree15

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Welcome, Ellsie! Yes, this is exactly the right place!

Also: Been there, done that! It's a long time ago, though. My parents weren't thrilled about my change of lifestyle either. Could I not make an exception just this one time? Just for Christmas? Could I not at least eat fish? "No one will think less of you if you do." And so on and so on. Well, I stuck to my guns.

And don't worry if you make mistakes, it's only human. I know I've made my fair share. You're still vegan! Just get back on the horse, uh - hobby horse?
This. My mom is a wonderful cook and her first response was, what I am I going to cook for you now when you come to visit? Well, it's been 12 years, and now I've got her and other family members eating black bean burgers, Beyond Meat burgers and all manner of tasty desserts. My dad, a true mean -and-potatoes man, even eats my zucchini fritters and vegan sausages. They all regularly drink almond milk. So, while they haven't embraced veganism full on, they are doing less harm with not a whole lot of effort.

@ApologeticallyGenuine just stick to your convictions and remember all the good you are doing for the animals and the planet. :) You've made a great choice in going vegan. :)