Nightmare parents from hell

NOT123

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Oct 1, 2017
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Lifestyle
  1. Vegan
the shorter edited version;
(all you need to know and all you want to know)

Doomed & I always have been.
 
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Hi,

It is perfectly obvious that you have a mind of your own. Otherwise you could not be vegan in a non-vegan household. You probably need several heart to hearts with someone you can trust so you can sort out your own way forward to a happy and secure future.

I don’t think this forum is the right place to offer that. We are a disparate lot here, sometimes far too opinionated and self-satisfied! Probably the best on offer would be “Get yourself out of there” or “Get yourself a girlfriend” or, even worse, “Put your foot down.” And we can never know anywhere near enough about your personal circumstances to offer considered suggestions. Like for example your financial situation, how well you relate to others, your self-esteem.

I would strongly advise a visit to your doctor for a brief chat hoping for an introduction to a counsellor who could offer support.

Or you could make initial contact with one of the charities such as the Samaritans. I am not at all inferring that you are suicidal but the person you speak to could point you in a better direction than anybody here could.

Good luck,

Roger.
 
The best advice you'll probably never take is to stop giving them something to push back against. Let them rage, let them judge, let them holler and yell all they want. Once they realize that they aren't getting the responses they are used to, they are lost as what to do. You'll find your life is easier if you truly approach them with indifference. They'll try everything to get back to the way things used to be. They'll even try being nice. Don't bite on their attempts to engage and you won't believe how things change. Don't be nice to them and don't be mean to them. Be equanimous. Good luck. You might learn something about yourself along the way.
 
Well, I'd say it sort of is to do with this forum because I dont know any vegans and about 99.9% of my freinds only care about themselves because they don't have the self control to not be cruel which vegans are supposed to have. I also know every forum on the internet has a gang of sarcastic regulars who don't let anyone else have a say. But I'm always annoyed that theres nothing done to help isolated vegans and people at veg fairs are usually only there to buy soap & cake rather than make freinds with unfortunate people walking round on their own year after year after year.
There's very little reward or thanks for anyone being a vegan or vegetarian for decades which everyone so badly wants the whole world to be. I know maybe you don't care about cruelty to your fellow vegans but you do when its an animal pacing round a cage all its life.
 
Hi again,

This forum can be very useful to someone who has a specific well defined problem. Respondents can immediately understand the situation and offer solutions. Sometimes the offerings are excellent. Sometimes they are mediocre. Sometimes they are downright rubbish. But at least the problem gets aired and somebody gets something off their chest.

Your original post centred on a problem that was so multi-faceted that I felt potential respondents would be at a loss to know where to start. They would feel they didn’t have the expertise to help. We are all in charge of our own salvations (in the secular meaning of the word you understand!) but I would again ask you to seriously consider seeking professional advice to help organise your way forward.

Wouldn’t you agree with me that the very best threads on the forum are those posing straight forward questions or observations? I appreciate that there is often somebody who irritatingly takes the discussion off at a complete tangent. I admit to suffering from that tendency myself! But there is usually somebody else to bring it back on track again.

Your second post contains the germs of several ideas that might start off a couple of new threads from you. Based on for example, “Do veg fairs serve any purpose”. Or, “Do vegans care more for animals than people”. Or, “Is the forum dominated by too many regulars who get all the say” though that one might step on too many toes. ;)

Anyway, good luck with your future.

Roger.
 
I think Roger was very helpful in recommending counselling and/or seeing your doctor. You might also find some of the self-help groups where you live useful. If you don't get some good answers to your problems on this forum, keep posting till you do.