How do you tell your friends...?

[Dreadlockmama]

Hello, I'm Hannah and I went vegan on the 1st of Jan this year (after being veggie for a couple of years) it's wonderful, a very freeing feeling ❤️
I was wondering what people have said to their close friends about 'going vegan'? How can I explain it without seeming judgemental? Health is only a small part of my decision to be vegan and mostly it's about being living in a non violent way, not eating dead animals and doing my part for the environment. I want to explain this to them but don't want to seem angry, judgy or preachy..... Any advice welcome. Thanks for reading xxxxxx

 

[Damo]

Hello Hannah!

Honestly, I think you should just tell your friends maybe tell your closest friends first I wouldn't announce that you were wanting to go or are vegan on social media for example. When I first told my friends they were a little surprised and but mostly concerned probably because they thought I'd die eating nothing but plants, after explaining why I chose to become vegan they understood and that was quite literally that.

I want to explain this to them but don't want to seem angry, judgy or preachy

I think this depends on the person on whether or not they see you coming across as "angry, judgy or preachy", just explain your reasons for choosing veganism I'm sure they'll understand

 

[Dreadlockmama]

thankyou Damo,
I have not made any announcements on social media as its really none of anyone's business and I don't need to explain myself to acquaintances I think it's mostly that I imagine people think of a vegan lifestyle as quite extreme! (I thought it was at one time!) When actually it's the total opposite.

I am an avid 'full term' breastfeeder (I have 4 daughters❤️) and when you tell people how wonderful breastfeeding is and how it is normal and the best thing for a baby (all facts) they see it as an attack on them if they chose to formula feed. I guess that's the only way I can discribe it.

My close friends love me and I hope they will listen to facts and take on board my life choice... I don't think it will surprise them too much.

My mum is very supportive which is lovely❤️ As is my husband (mostly)

 

[winter.frost]

Hi Hannah. Welcome to the community!

Honestly, I didn't tell anyone I had 'gone vegan'. I agree with Damo about not 'announcing' it, seems like you do too. The subject gradually broached itself, say, when out at a café and ordering soy milk – 'why are you ordering soy?' 'Oh, I'm vegan now.' I found this to be the easiest way to do it. At one point I suppose I did consider loudly 'coming out' and telling everyone, but I couldn't find a way to do it without sounding sanctimonious.

So that's how I'd do it. See if your friends notice. Say they offer you some food, and you kindly say 'no thank you' or ask to check the ingredients and then they ask 'why'. Or you could invite them to lunch and given them the proof in the pudding! But if you can get them to ask it might then rule out the possibility of feeling actively judged. You can then answer any questions they might have about veganism or ask them if there's anything they'd like to know. Doing it this way doesn't make you any less vegan or any less a 'good vegan'. Sometimes it's far easier to talk about all the benefits of veganism with a stranger than it is someone you've known a long time.

As for once thinking veganism 'extreme' - almost all of us have been there at one point in our lives. I guess that's one reason why Vegan Smythe sports a tear tattoo.

We have a whole section here dedicated to vegan relationship topics you might find interesting as well.

 

[Dreadlockmama]

Thankyou! That makes a lot of sense. Just 'be vegan' and then wait for them to ask. Your right it's easier to talk to strangers about it!
I will have a look at the relationship section. My husband (of almost 10years) is like 'I totally get it but why do you have to check everything for tiny amounts of milk and egg!!??' And I told him 'go hard or go home' it's all animal abuse and exploitation however tiny the amount. Plus I have lost almost a stone of excess weight since 1st of Jan! And now I'm a healthy bmi! And fit in to my clothes! Which is awesome Thanks for your help xxxx