Buying animal based products to loved ones

[Deleted member 3018]

I had a situation yesterday where me and my dad went out to get some coffee. I was buying and he wanted cappuccino. I paused and thought about starting to lecture about the horrors of milk production. But then I thought that I didn't want to ruin the day.

In the past I have even bought milk chocolate and cheese to loved ones during birthdays, anniversaries and holidays. A few years ago I told everyone that I won't do that anymore, because it's against my morals, ethics and a way of life.

But that cappuccino was so sudden. I didn't know what to do or how to go about it without causing a scene. I have difficulties expressing my thoughts verbally because of my neurological problems. But animal rights is something I'm very passionate about and want to be effective in my activism.
What would you have done?

What do you usually do in situations like these?

 

[silva]

I had a situation yesterday where me and my dad went out to get some coffee. I was buying and he wanted cappuccino. I paused and thought about starting to lecture about the horrors of milk production. But then I thought that I didn't want to ruin the day.

In the past I have even bought milk chocolate and cheese to loved ones during birthdays, anniversaries and holidays. A few years ago I told everyone that I won't do that anymore, because it's against my morals, ethics and a way of life.

But that cappuccino was so sudden. I didn't know what to do or how to go about it without causing a scene. I have difficulties expressing my thoughts verbally because of my neurological problems. But animal rights is something I'm very passionate about and want to be effective in my activism.
What would you have done?

What do you usually do in situations like these?

I think you did right in the situation. When you have control, use it, but there are times when I've found it's just better to see the bigger picture--like have a good time with someone and putting differences in outlooks aside

I had an even situation I completely screwed up! I am totally weird when it comes to interactions with people--all. my. life. I am where I am from the the method of watching and mimicking. Like the 'fake it till you make it". But it never feels comfortable for more than short periods of time.
At work I knew we were going to have a send off in the cafeteria for a retiring worker, with cake, at break time. I take my morning break earlier than most, and at second break I ran into the co worker who plans these things as said "hey where's the cake?" She said it was at the earlier break and felt terrible that I didn't know. Anyway, I said oh I didn't want cake anyway. The next day I find a bag at my desk and here she brought me a piece of cake! . I thanked her and left it be.
It would have been so weird and awkward to go into "I'm vegan and don't eat cake" and ruin a truly nice gesture. There may be another time I get the opportunity to talk about it (again really as we have ) but being friends and just being nice were far more important. There are many better things to do to advance your opinions.
I'll make it a point to bring a treat for everyone that is labeled with its vegan ingredients recipe, that everyone will like

 

[Emma JC]

I agree with @silva, you did the right thing - it is not our job to police/lecture the world and especially our families with whom we interact with regularly and don't need make it uncomfortable to do so.

You walk your talk and show by example and by being loving and compassionate you extend that love to all.

Emma JC
Find your vegan soulmate or just a friend. www.spiritualmatchmaking.com

 

[Deleted member 3018]

Thank you for sharing your insights @silva and @Emma JC.

I do believe, just like Emma said that showing by example is sometimes a lot more important than lecturing. There is a time and place for teaching people, but like you both said, this wasn't the time. It would have made everything awkward.

I always want to do everything I can for the animals. And it really started to bother me when I pondered if I was contributing to cows getting violated by failing to speak up on their behalf.

It's difficult when loved ones don't seem to get it no matter how many times you tell them.

I'm sorry @silva that you got into that sort of an troublesome situation at work.
I like your idea of serving good vegan food for people. That definitely is something what would make veganism seem more accessible for others.