Requesting cruelty free gifts

CrazyCatLady

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This post isn't that dissimilar than my 'to offer or not to offer' one. In that it focuses on not offending people.
My nan will ALWAYS buy me 'smellies' for Xmas, usually Avon body cream etc.
How do you think is best to let her know that if she is going to buy me anything like that I'd like them to be from a cruelty free company (which as everyone I'm sure is aware no longer entails Avon after they have bowed down to China's demands) xxx
 
Casually mention your favourite brand of "smellies" (that are of course, cruelty-free) and hope for the best? I don't know how one would politely ask for something specific though. Maybe some others have better ideas.
 
Yeah, that's the thing. If you never ask for anything and suddenly ask for something specific, it could look as if you didn't enjoy her past gifts. I'm not sure how to handle this. Sorry, I'm no help at all! :oops:
 
Yeah, that's the thing. If you never ask for anything and suddenly ask for something specific, it could look as if you didn't enjoy her past gifts. I'm not sure how to handle this. Sorry, I'm no help at all! :oops:

Don't apologise. It's nice to talk it through with someone that understands the situation instead of just thinking I'm ungrateful or should just accept any gift xxx
 
My close friends and family are pretty great - they automatically check to see if things are vegan. My mum asked me which bath products were vegan, so I told her to just go to Lush where everything was labelled :p My mum then made sure all other members of family knew I was vegan, and that this extended to cosmetics and clothing and so on because they would always ask her what me and my brother would like.

I still get quite a few non-vegan things from distant relatives, though - mostly chocolate. I don't feel like I can really bring it up, so those presents just get donated to other people :p

How often do you talk to your nan? Does she ever ask you what you want for Christmas? I'm trying to work out if there's some way of working it into the conversation...
 
I was thinking about this earlier as this is my first Vegan Christmas.

I'm not sure how to broach the subject with some family members, and even my mum who does her best and really tries hard for me has brought me goodies from Lush before that aren't vegan. And the though of calling family up I don't speak to that often and saying "don't get me perfume etc" is horrible as that sounds so ungrateful and rude :confused:
 
This is very tricky to do politely, especially if she doesn't ask what you want but buys what she thinks you'd like. In the next few weeks I would try to drop it into conversation that you've got a big stock of shower gel/body lotion/perfume/etc. cluttering up your bathroom cabinet and you don't know how you're going to get through it all... or that you're trying to use more natural products because you've read something about the dangers of chemicals on your skin (you could read something about the dangers of chemicals on your skin if you don't like telling white lies :D) or other conversational ways of letting her know you don't want beauty products this year. Of course she mind end up buying you natural non-vegan products, or buying you milk chocolates instead or something, that's something most vegans face.

If it helps, what I usually do is accept it graciously and then give it away to someone who can use it, or use it myself if that's not possible (within my own personal bounadries - I wouldn't eat milk chocolate, but I'd probably use a non-vegan shower gel).
 
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Could you mention it to another family member to pass on sort of thing.
My Gran would get me 'smellies' but when I went CF my Mam used to just buy the brands I use and give them to my Gran to wrap up and give me. :)
 
Could you mention it to another family member to pass on sort of thing.
My Gran would get me 'smellies' but when I went CF my Mam used to just buy the brands I use and give them to my Gran to wrap up and give me. :)

Yeah this is what I was going to suggest. My mum pretty much mediates my families gift buying for me to try to make sure it's all vegan.For one Nan she usually buys things for my Nan to give me, and for my other Nan she usually suggests something very specific. It depends on your Nan, but this is what suits mine.

For a while when I was newly vegan, sometimes I accepted gifts that weren't vegan, politely thanked them, and either gave it away or took it back to the shop for a refund. I felt really bad and ungrateful doing that, but I didn't know what else to do. If people ask you (or your parents) what you want it's easy to suggest CF things, but some people never ask if there is anything you want, and so you can't really suggest anything without it looking rude. You can't just assume people want to buy you gifts, even if they do every single Christmas for your whole life! In those instances, I'm not really sure either if there's anything polite you can do except accept it :s
 
I was hoping that there was maybe a cartoon pic along the lines of 'dear Santa, for Xmas I would like some cf gifts' with like a lush logo lol. Then I could share or add it on Facebook for people (including my nan who is always on fb) to see. No such luck tho xxx
 
You could make your own? Like this:

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Or, if your nan is on Facebook, maybe just post up one or two things from a CF company that you would like - "this lush shower gel looks so good, hope I get to try it out soon!"' or something on your status. This way, she'll see it, but it won't be obviously directed at her, and she will hopefully take the hint
 
Or, if your nan is on Facebook, maybe just post up one or two things from a CF company that you would like - "this lush shower gel looks so good, hope I get to try it out soon!"' or something on your status. This way, she'll see it, but it won't be obviously directed at her, and she will hopefully take the hint

Brilliant idea. Thanks xxx
 
I still get quite a few non-vegan things from distant relatives, though - mostly chocolate. I don't feel like I can really bring it up, so those presents just get donated to other people :p
If it helps, what I usually do is accept it graciously and then give it away to someone who can use it, or use it myself if that's not possible (within my own personal bounadries - I wouldn't eat milk chocolate, but I'd probably use a non-vegan shower gel).

This. If she doesn't take a hint and ends up buying them for you, and you aren't comfortable using them, give them to someone else who is. It might keep them from buying a bottle of the stuff that they would have picked up without your gift, so that's one less bottle purchased.
 
Thought I would give an update as Christmas has now come and gone.

Firstly, my nan prepared and cooked a lovely Christmas dinner for me. I had Linda McCartney sausages instead of meat. Though she used butter with their carrot and parsnip she did a portion for me separately. She used vegetable oil instead of goose fat for the roast potatoes. And I had bisto gravy instead of what everyone else had.
Then I found out that though my 22 year old chavvy younger brother just gave me money as a gift, he had spent a whole day looking around the shops for a vegan cookbook (unsuccessfully and got himself stressed).
My mum checked my favourite alcohol to make sure it was vegan for me.
My housemate got me a big box of Lush goodies (even though he hates the smell of the shop and usually waits outside for me).
My boyfriend's family also got me Lush goodies and his sister did an extra gift of a hamper of all the dairy free chocolate she could find for me.
I also found out that my boss was my secret Santa and had found an ex-library vegan recipe book that she got for me.
Very grateful to have such amazing people in my life xxx
 
Wow...that's impressive! Great to have such wonderful people in your life! :)
 
Yay for all the cruelty-free gifts and food!

One thing I was worrying about was my office secret santa, as nobody here knows I'm vegan (although they do know I don't eat meat or dairy and have to check the labels on everything I eat). But somebody got me some vegan chocolates :) My own non-immediate relatives, however, mostly ignored the vegan thing (and even the vegetarian thing, lots of gelatine in this year's presents) so I've been handing out sweets and chocolates to all the omnis in my life :p