Long Distance Relationships

[RascalsMom]

I know at least one other member here who is in one, and a few who started out that way, but are living together now. I figured I'd start a thread to share stories/advice/venting/whining about missing them/etc.

 

[Rosie1]

Yes, I'm in one.
Thank god for Skype.

 

[RascalsMom]

I'm in one, too.
Short version: I grew up with my boyfriend and have known him since I was 9 or 10. We both liked each other as young awkward teens, but never really did anything about it. I moved away when I was 16, and he moved away shortly afterwards. Once we started talking regularly again, we hit it off, and he came to visit me. Since then, we've been making a long distance thing work and visiting each other back and fourth. We do hope it won't be long distance much longer, though.

 

[Mel]

Long story short:

My former-long-distance relationship started 7 years ago. We are now no longer in a long-distance relationship. We're now an old married couple.

Okay, so our second wedding anniversary isn't until next winter, but we've been in this for 7 years now.

 

[Rosie1]

Yeah, Mel. I've told my dude about you guys - sticking with it so long even when it was hard, etc. It is inspiring stuff.

The dude and I are separated by 3600 miles, me in the US and him in Canada. We met a few years ago through a mutual friend on Flickr. We email and Skype all the time but haven't met IRL yet. Plane tickets are ******* expensive, plus I need to get a passport.

 

[Mel]

I'm glad that our story can give a little inspiration and hope.

It can work.

 

[SuicideBlonde]

I love these stories!

 

[FortyTwo]

I'm probably in several. But, the other parties may or may not (read: don't) know of their participation. Shhh!

 

[SummerRain]

Me and my fiance started out in a long distance relationship, we live together now and have done for 2 years. I think there are actually some benefits - even though it sucks at the time. For example when we could see each other we spent longer period of time together - sometimes a couple of weeks or so - and I think this meant we got to know how well we could live together on a day-to-day basis, we got to know each other not just at our best - but with morning breath, and lounging around in our PJs, and when we were in bad moods or tired, etc, so that when we moved in together I never felt worried, or thought things might change, because I was used to spending time with him 24/7 and doing boring things together, and used to his habits and what he was like normally rather than just when he was in a good mood or just when we were on dates.

We phoned each other, talked online, text, and chatted on webcam a lot. Modern technology is really good in that respect, even though we weren't together we still shared our days with each other and talked every day. The hardest part I think was that we also saw each other a lot for just a day or just the weekends, taking long train journeys to meet half-way or at one another's houses for a few hours together and then having to leave again. It was very expensive, all my spare money went on train tickets, most of my spare time was spent travelling to see, and seeing, my boyfriend so I saw less of my friends outside of college, and then it only lasted a little amount of time and I was always so sad to leave and say goodbye again. It was all worth it though, we're so happy together now

 

[AeryFairy]

The fiancé and I became long-distance when I moved away to uni nearly 4 years ago. We've been 220 miles apart for most of our relationship. We're moving in together next month

 

[yakherder]

Started out in different countries, and even had a deployment to Afghanistan before eventually moving to Quebec to close the distance.

 

[Marie]

 

[peacefulveglady]

I am in process of starting a long distant well sorta going slow with it with a guy friend. He wants to help me get better and stuff.

 

[Envy]

LDR hardly seems worth it.

 

[AeryFairy]

LDR hardly seems worth it.

It all depends on the person you're in one with.

 

[Envy]

It all depends on the person you're in one with.

Wouldn't it be worse if it was a better person?

 

[Mel]

LDR hardly seems worth it.

You can't possibly know that's the case for every LDR there ever was. Just saying. I hate when someone says that, that hasn't been through what I have (or something similar). I'm not talking about having tried it out for a week either.

Both parties have to be serious about it as a long term thing, you can't just casually date someone long distance and expect it to go well and not have heartache.

 

[AeryFairy]

Wouldn't it be worse if it was a better person?

Yes, absolutely. But eventually that part will be over. An LDR isn't usually a permanent thing, after all. What you're left with, if it's the right person, is an incredibly strong relationship (an LDR involves a lot of trust, effort and communication) and generally a better appreciation of your time together. A little heartache is worth it for someone really special, in my opinion (and experience).

 

[Mel]

I am in process of starting a long distant well sorta going slow with it with a guy friend. He wants to help me get better and stuff.

Good luck! Remember to be very careful.

 

[peacefulveglady]

Good luck! Remember to be very careful.

I am planning to be careful, we are building the friendship, then relationship over time.